Recap

OK we need to catch up! :)


Actually quite a bit happened in February, it was quite interesting, at least to me.

I went to the Inauguration, had so much fun. I really love being with my family, we make EVERYTHING a family affair.

Around 3:00am at the Springfield train station in VA on our way to the Capitol!


Around 5:30am


The crowd behind us. The atmosphere was crazy!


My auntie and I huddled together. It was brick!



At the end, if we looked up we could see Bush flying away in his helicopter.



Got laid off :/ and what sucks is that it wasn't our fault. We had a high shrink therefore out inventory was some crap! The hood got us fired man...

I'm doing very well so far in my classes this semester. I'm praying for Dec 2009!

I've been going out a lot more, which is cool but can get kinda old kinda quick. Still fun though.

At some lounge lol...



I'm a God Mommy now, lol. One of my best friends had a baby and shes so fatnsweet I can't wait to see her!


More to come, I gotta go workout before I get too lazy today....

20 Random Facts About Moi

My bad, Happy New Year.

Though there isn't much that's new right now hmm...inventory at my job is coming up, lol, borrring. Classes start next week, good, it's time to get this show on the road. Though I'm really confused about what I want to do after I graduate and it's starting to get scary. I'm thinkin about the peace corps...seriously...

There actually has been a lot on my mind lately and it's hard to sort everything out because it's so jumbled up, I'll elaborate soon.


Confession: I've visited McDonalds one too many times this week. I'm a sucker for apple pie and chicken nuggets, :/ lol I swear they put crack in them!


Confession #2: Although I feel healthier I thought that by losing weight I'd be happier, the truth is I don't know if I am.

So here's a fun chain letter thingy that's floating around FB and I thought I'd post it with a little editing of course!

20 RANDOM FACTS:

1) I drink ice cold tap water from a mason jar when I'm back home in NC. lol

2) It wouldn't behoove anyone to lie to me because the truth always reveals itself to me whether they know it or not.

3) It really irritates me when people aren't mindful of my time or space, that's definitely a make or breaker.

4) I am the "best worst" procrastinator when it comes to school, lol...sheeyit it may not get done when wanted, but it's always on time.

5) Dottie Peoples is my favorite gospel artist. Angela Bassett my favorite actress. Tom Hanks is my favorite actor. Spike Lee is my favorite producer/director.

6) I love love love 60's rock/psychedelic music and 80's soft rock.

7) I think tattoos and body piercings are cool.

8) My favorite song is It's Raining Men.

9) I’m very open minded, understanding and I don’t judge. I’m not very petty nor do I like confrontation.

10) I love NCIS, Law&Order:SVU, and reality TV, I know most of it isn't real but who doesn't enjoy mindless entertainment from time to time?!?

11) One day I’m going to disappear to an island where no one can find me and lay on the beach all day watching the sunset while sipping my Corona Light listening to Carlos Santana, Peter Frampton and Jimmy Buffett.

12) I believe in love but with the state of relationships nowadays and marriage looking bleak I'm starting to think it wont happen for me...and I'm actually ok with that.

13) I have all the symptoms of the OCS (Only Child Syndrome).

14) I want to do competition Latin ballroom dancing…and I will one day. And body building when I'm like 45, the sexy lean kind, not the BIG muscles.

15) I'm related to Busta Rythmes, Michael Jordan and Thelonious Monk.

16) I'd love to have sex with a blindfold on both of us.

17) I kinda don’t know how to drive.

18) I secretly wish that someone would knock on my front door and just kidnap me for the day. No call, no warning, just take me...*sigh* :}

19) I wish I had more female friends.

20) I love pineapples and pomegranates., lmao...that one is for you T.

What I'm dealing with pt 1

Well onto a favorite subject of mine, sex, yesss!

Why is it so consuming?
I'd rather have sex right now than eat...but why? lol...

I've been in a bit of a drought for the past 4 months and it's been extremely difficult, well at least the last 2 months. I mean drought from everything, there's no one that I'm physically involved with or emotionally invested in at the moment, and for good reason! It's hard to go from getting it on the regular to quitting cold turkey; voluntarily and involuntary, mainly because I know I will not climax if I don't have some sort of connection with the man and involuntarily because...well I have no prospects really, lol. I wake up in the morning clenching my thighs together because a certain organ wont stop throbbing! Squeezing them together only makes the situation worse because I can feel my pearl rubbing up against my VHP. During the day I'm surrounded by beautiful, good smelling, black men who I fantasize about but at work I'm surrounded by too many damn women (the estrogen is stifling thus making my craving for testosterone even more intense). I finally get home (occupied by yes,three women other than myself) only to take a shower...alone...get in my bed to either toss and turn all night, battle with the idea of playin with the kat or somehow slip into an extremely erotic dream where I'm usually awoken by my own moans or the wetness that's left its' mark on my sheets.

Now I thought I had a cure for each issue presented but they've only left me embarrassed or in worse condition than where I started....

The insomnia-- usually when I sleep next to someone it helps me fall asleep so I'll invite a platonic homeboy over, we'll fall sleep but I notice whenever I do that the wet dreams come and wind up involving whoever I'm sleeping next to and I wind up startling them with involuntary movements or sounds, ahem, OR, they'll snore and I'll still get no sleep.
End result: Horny and wide awake still!

Petting the kitty-- just makes me insatiable, it's never enough and I get the urge to call someone who I know can please me to finish the job, only problem with that is the only men that know how are my ex's (big no-no!). So I'd just rather not do it.
End result: Horny and reminiscing about past escapades with the ex's (the good and the bad ugh!)

Ok, I can't really control the dreams I have so I just try to wake myself up...
End result: Doesn't work!


SO I've tried to occupy my time with other activities, homework, lol, working out, eating, mindlessly watching TV, excessive cleaning, texting, meditating, chiefing, lol...they still don't get my endorphins working like a good ol romp in the sheets will..

I just think it would be so nice to come home, take a nice hot shower with someone, have them rub me down with some Shea butter (and you know that shit is thick so it just might wind up being a mini massage ;)). A lil cunnilingus here, a lil fellatio there and some slow stroking to top it off, mmmmm...

or

Just rip my clothes off, pin me down and &^%)#* me like you're mad at me! I'm serious, just down right nasty and raunchy (Sometimes a female needs to be reminded that she is a woman!) hmmm...or on some Way of a Man with a Maid type of play...

In addition to that size does matter, it NEEDS to fit like a glove, there's something about having all your walls touched at the same time that drives a gal crazy....


I know, I know, a hot mess I am, but hey, I feel like expressing myself.







And now for a cold shower.

Gettin the bullsh!t out the way...

Just some things I've been wanting to say for a very long time....

*I got advised and will hopefully *fingers crossed* be done in the fall!

*I'm realizing I'm not completely over a certain situation that I thought I was, but oh well, I'll just have to deal with it. I indeed miss you very much and like I said before I just can't help it...

*Confession: I feel as though I think more logically than a lot of my peers...

*150!!!!!!

*...On the other hand I'm still pissed because I felt like someone didn't fight for me, for us, for what we could have had...it could have been so beautiful. Even though I was upset about some things at the time we still could have talked it out especially when you told me how you felt a certain way about me...but that lets me know a lot about the situation, maybe your heart really wasn't in it, infatuation is a bitch, it might actually make person think they're in love....but I will never understand why it was always so easy for you to go back to...oh wait, maybe it's that love thing again...

*I find passive-aggressive people very attractive.

*Why do I have to be the one to grit my teeth and just deal? I want to be obnoxious sometimes, I want to get triflin sometimes, I want to scream and shout and break things and say FUCK YOU, YOU FUCK-ASS NIGGA!, I want to whoop some people's asses sometimes.......but instead I chuckle, shake my head and :)

*That last one (^) felt really good.

*My vices replace each other...I have 5.

*I'm realizing how much I don't like the winter, it's cold and gloomy outside and all I want to do is cuddle up next to someone in a very warm dimly lit room and fall asleep. But it's funny to me how I always seem to be involved with someone during the spring/summer seasons but never the fall/winter and that's when I want to huggle the most. So on top of being freezing, you have cold sheets (lol), a low sex drive/no prospects, finals, "friends" or should I say frenemies, and a job that keeps cutting your hours.

*I think I have a problem with run-on sentences.

*But, I have my health, a loving family, a couple true friends and December 2009/May 2010 to look forward to.

*And I think I may also have a problem with starting sentences with conjunctions.
















*Cunt is my favorite word.

[Untitled]

I received a call this morning that my great grandma of 94 years passed away. It hurts a lot but I know that she's home now. I'm just happy that I got to see her this far into my like but it's crazy to me because it feels like it was just yesterday that I was a little girl and she was teaching me how to crochet. Unfortunately I wont be able to go to her funeral because of lack of funds, it sucks but I guess I have to deal with it. The day before I moved to Atlanta to start undergrad in 2005 my great aunt, her sister, passed away and that was very hard to deal with also (I didn't get to go to her funeral either). But now knowing that they're together is comforting. So whenever you get a chance please say a little prayer for my family and I, Thanks.

Things that make you go ugh!

OK so I have 8am classes all week long and Tuesday/Thursday are my longest days 8am-4:20pm. I had an exam today that I know I at least got a B on (physiological psych aint no ho!) and finally wound up in my last class of the day. Now, this week is a bit stressful for me because I haven't had a lot of sleep (insomnia's a biatch), a ton of studying to do, maad assignments, and I'm still a little pissed because my job had to cut payroll by 35% so I have no hours at all this week! (I had planned on saving a lil $ so I could go to this Camp Lo concert on the 18th but it looks like that's not happening...) So yeah I've been a little irritable all week on top of unnecessary drama from other sources...got in my last class, senior seminar and this dude put the icing on the cake...

We have portfolios' due before the end of the semester, that's what the class and professor agreed on "Get it into me just as soon as you can" says the professor. Cool, I can do that. So this damn fellow student of mine, always on his high horse, kinda narcissistic, pops up and says, "Can't we turn it in next Thursday?!" The class in a roar says "NOOOOOOOOO!" but since the professor is in the same frat I guess he sided with him and said "Ok, next Thursday it's due." Mind you no one's really worked on it, it's not hard but it's going to take some time, time that I didn't anticipate spending on it this week since I have other projects to do and exams to study for. Everyone cut their eyes at our fellow student, it was hilarious. "Man, I'm trying to get this done ya'll!" he says, the class is still in an uproar and you hear miscellaneous people saying "Whatever, then you turn it on on Thursday, damn!" "You fuckin it up for the rest of us man!". "And weren't you absent last week, wtf!" lol. It's funny now but damn, I'm not trying to do all this mess at once, my brain is fried, it's time to freakin graduate already, too bad I'll need an extra semester of this, ugh! I love my alma mater but damn, it's time to go! lol...

Don't get me wrong, I don't mind doing the work, it'll actually be very beneficial in the end but this new deadline...man...I need a shot.

Anywho, I worked out today and meditated. I'm praying for clarity to get this work done and peace of mind to not go off on anyone while in the process...

Pictures!

Just a few photos...


My best friend and I hanging out for a friend's birthday.
My fellow bandmates and I enjoying homecoming!

One of my favorite homeboys and bandmates! Another favorite fellow bandmate!


Speaking of band, I must say we definitely blew Savannah State out the water! I haven't heard the band sound so good since I was last in it, lol, great job guys! I swear there is nothing like someone who can play an instrument...

The football team did well also, didn't win but did well 17-14.



On another note check out this video, I love this song! I also love Marvin...and Bobby Hebb, lol